Party Bong 101
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Filling the bong is a pretty straight forward affair: open a beverage and pour it on in. You may want to make a scratch at the fill line so if you're using a barrel or other large-volume container of bevrage later you'll know how much "enough" is. Let the foam settle a bit. There is some anecdotal evidence that by wiping one's finger along one's nose or forehead and stirring the begreased finger in the foam it will settle faster. While effective, this tends to gross most folks out somewhat, so better to do this with good friends or when everyone's too drunk to notice. If you're not in a hurry, hanging the bong up on a hook to sit quietly is the best of all methods. Foam unsettles the stomach and makes drinking it harder to finish, so take your time. The best beverage is cold and somewhat flat to begin with .


Drinking the beverage is a pretty cut and dry. The holder elevates the bong at arm's length while the receiver kneels and takes the bong into their mouth. Certain oral sex parallels can and will be made. Depending on the involved parties, their drunkenness and their respective heights, they holder may want to stand on a chair, stairs or other elevated position. Take your time: the bong is the single most intimidating method of beverage intake and takes a certain mental discipline to be able to do it smoothly without gagging or faltering. Relax, think happy thoughts, open your throat a bit and get ready. When it's time, make sure the valve is on the top of the operation list and let her rip.

Common problems:


Many first-timers have a jolt reaction when they suck off the bong. Taking the rush of beverage proves to be too much for their systems and their throat constricts or their tongue will shoot back involuntarily in an attempt to ward off the onrushing evil. Beverage will go one of two places: out the mouth or out the nose. If it's the latter, it's a proper "snarf", though the term applies loosely to the former as well. Snarfing is incredibly painful since the old sinus cavities are not designed to hold cold, frothy, fermented beverages. The only solutions you have here are to hold your nose and wait for it to pass or to snort the beverage down, or both. Don't try to blow it out--it will only hurt once.

Performance Anxiety
A lot of people freak out the first time they bong and will try to back down. To minimize this, make sure their first time is a positive one. Go someplace quiet and outside the hullabaloo of the party and do a one-on-one bong with less pressure and distractions. Don't make anybody bong who doesn't want to.

Failure to finish
Sometimes it happens and somebody can't handle the volume of beer in the bong. The best of all possible worlds is to let the bonger settle a moment and try to finish the remaining batch. This is both the honorable and most postive way of finishing. If this doesn't work, remember that the bong is immune from backwash and can simply be refilled for the next participant.
Regular cleaning:
If you aren't going to be using your bong for a while, wash it out with clean water and hang it up to dry. That's it! If you can get into the habit of hanging it up to drip-dry between uses you won't get into trouble with the bong getting too funky.

  Care & Maintenance

Emergency cleaning:

It happens: everybody takes a few pulls off the old bong, it gets left in the backyard and next weekend you pull it out only to find out that it's become a science project. Don't panic--it's a solvable problem. Thoroughly Rinse the bong with hot water. The tubing will be a real bitch and is usually the part that gets funkiest.Close valves and fill it with a hot water and salt solution. Let soak for an hour and rinse out a few times with clean hot water to make sure everything is good and sterile. Rinse it really, really well and you're on your way.

Long-term maintenance:

Over time your valves may discolor and get ugly. You can clean it pretty easily with a little warm white vinegar. Don't use bleach since it will make everything taste funky and is pretty unhealthy if a little gets left behind. If your tubing gets to smelling a bit funny, you can let it soak overnight in a solution of baking soda or salt and water. Over time the vinyl may discolor a bit, but it's still perfectly good to use.

Have fun with your bong and dont get into too much trouble.